whynot | Merlin: Character Motivation snippet

This icon is strangely appropriate! This snippet was written for

puckling, who requested for something set in the moody crackfest that is the Character Motivation universe. 287 words, rated PG. No warnings or spoilers.

When Bradley first arrived, oh so many months ago, he lived through the motions of Arthur's life and would think things like, "This dinner would probably more enjoyable if there was air-conditioning" and "I wish Camelot had a Wii so Morgana and I can fight in other ways outside of name-calling and sparring with dangerous weapons", but he learned to clamp these thoughts down. They weren't conducive to being Arthur, or to ruling a kingdom.

A kingdom is a bitch of a thing to rule when you're not naturally born to it. And even if you were.

Bradley has been reclaiming this practice recently. It's not for any big reason or anything; it's just that when he asks Merlin and Gaius, "Do you think I should just forgo Bradley completely and have even you two call me Arthur?", he receives only uncomfortable umms and ahhs. Gaius says, "Whatever gets you through the day," but somehow that doesn't sound like very sound advice, coming from Gaius.

Here's another uncomfortable question: "Do you think we should tell Gwen and Morgana who I am? I mean, they're good friends. And they can help out with the whole... y'know. What I mean to say is that if we're all on the same page, it might be easier to do things."

Same page, Bradley thinks ruefully. I'm not even part of the same story.

So yes, Bradley has been playing the "this would be better if" game more and more recently. Just in case.

Just in case what? Just in case I need to be Bradley again?

This would be better if you knew who I really am, Bradley thinks as he kisses Gwen, but the truth is he's not sure anymore.