whynot: SPN: all hail (i'll stop the world)
Lassiter ([personal profile] whynot) wrote2010-05-01 09:55 pm

"Man's Worst Friend" - Supernatural - Crowley - PG

Hellminster Hound Show of course refers to Westminster Dog Show.


Man's Worst Friend
Supernatural. Crowley and his doggie. PG. Written for the cuddlefic meme. 5x21 coda.
Written for the prompt: Crowley cuddling with his hellhounds!! 404 words.


As if canceling the Hellminster Hound Show on account of the apocalypse weren't bad enough, it appears the aversion of aforementioned apocalypse lies upon the shoulders of two nincompoop brothers whose only talents are sitting pretty and getting their loved ones killed. (Crowley toyed with that idea, tricking Lucifer and the Winchesters into some kind of affectionate alliance. Surely then the law of averages would take over and the devil would kick the bucket any day. This is currently Contingency Plan #73950-C.) Also, what an uneventful apocalypse. They canceled Hellminster for this?

"We would've cleaned up, Asmodeus," Crowley sighs, patting his hellhound's head. "You and I. Ribbons for Best In Show to display on my mantle, and a two year supply of reaped sinners for you."

Asmodeus barks his agreement, and gazes up at Crowley with watery eyes full of love and infernal fire.

"Good boy." Crowley takes out the treat jar full of the choicest bits of damned soul. These are usually rewards and nothing to spoil Asmodeus with, but now that Hellminster is off, he saw no reason to be so disciplined about it. Fuck it; it's the end of the world! Who cares that this year they would have actually stood a chance at winning first place, now that Lilith and her intolerable Mr. Tibbles are out of the running? (Lilith, the smug twat. After Lilith won, she liked giving the other demons advice on how to take better care of their hellhounds, and Crowley would have liked to take care of Lilith's face with a rake.)

The Winchesters have long taken off for South Dakota, and it's just Crowley and Asmodeus here in this abandoned house, mulling over their next move. Crowley holds out a handful of soul, and Asmodeus gobbles it up then licks his hand. Then rises on hind legs and puts two paws on Crowley's chest, licking his face.

"Oh, honestly," Crowley mutters, but he's not exactly pushing Asmodeus out of the way. The hellhound whines, and Crowley scratches it behind one ear, which only aggravates the aggressive tail-wagging. "You are shameless," Crowley informs him.

Asmodeus barks again.

"Must you do that in my face?" Crowley sighs, and lets Asmodeus lick his nose before reciprocating with a hearty kiss to the hellhound's snout. "How you continue to trick me into calling you 'good boy' is beyond me," Crowley says, and reaches for the treat jar once more.

[identity profile] avaritia-90.livejournal.com 2010-05-12 09:53 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not sure how I found this, but I'm glad I have. :D It's an adorable story and makes me love Crowley even more.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 05:52 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks! And hell yeah, Crowley is pretty fly.

[identity profile] tifaching.livejournal.com 2010-05-12 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't WANT to like Crowley, OR hellhounds, damn it! But this made me do both. And Lilith and Mr. Tibbles? LOL! This was great, thanks for sharing!

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 05:53 am (UTC)(link)
Thanks for reading!
ext_17044: (Default)

[identity profile] linda3m.livejournal.com 2010-05-12 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
My manager is from Oxford. She explained her relationship with her mother by saying, "My dear, we're British. We only show affection to horses and dogs."

In other words - this story is perfect!

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:42 pm (UTC)(link)
"My dear, we're British. We only show affection to horses and dogs."
THAT is perfect. XD Thank you!

[identity profile] vanillafluffy.livejournal.com 2010-05-12 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Made of win!

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks!

[identity profile] tahirire.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 12:13 am (UTC)(link)
AHHH. LOVE! :D

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:43 pm (UTC)(link)
*RECIPROCATES* ;)

[identity profile] jabber-moose.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
I was waiting and waiting for someone to fill this one. YES!

This = WIN. I'm in love

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I started discussing the prompt with someone in chat and suddenly I couldn't not do it. XD Glad you enjoyed, thanks!

[identity profile] sarcasticval.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
Crowley toyed with that idea, tricking Lucifer and the Winchesters into some kind of affectionate alliance. Surely then the law of averages would take over and the devil would kick the bucket any day. This is currently Contingency Plan #73950-C.

I love you.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:44 pm (UTC)(link)
NO, YOU. <3

[identity profile] lexhibition.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 12:31 pm (UTC)(link)


THIS MAKES MY TAIL WAG IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

Adoooooorrrrrable.

& ffffff Lilith and Mr. Tibbles. I'll bet she decorated his collar with little bows of intentine.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:49 pm (UTC)(link)
OOH LA LAAAA

I'll bet she decorated his collar with little bows of intentine.
Of course! And Mr. Tibbles's chew toys are made from the ribs of the damned.

[identity profile] murron.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 01:04 pm (UTC)(link)
This? Made of AWESOME!!! I haven't laughed like this in a good long while!

"We would've cleaned up, Asmodeus," Crowley sighs, patting his hellhound's head. "You and I. Ribbons for Best In Show to display on my mantle, and a two year supply of reaped sinners for you."

:))))))))

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww yay! Thanks, glad to spread laughter. XD

[identity profile] meret.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 01:10 pm (UTC)(link)
LOL! Very cute. :)

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks! :)

[identity profile] stubbel.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
A+++++++ ♥

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
XD XD XD <3
ext_35076: photo of a Harry Dresden character with my user name along the bottom. (momwantsme)

[identity profile] crevanfox.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 02:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Amazing fic, I love crack fic. This is just brilliant.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:54 pm (UTC)(link)
I got a soft spot for crackfic, I will admit. Thanks!
innie_darling: (dean says annyong to his hermano)

[personal profile] innie_darling 2010-05-13 03:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Aww! Also, hee - only talents are sitting pretty and getting their loved ones killed. (Crowley toyed with that idea, tricking Lucifer and the Winchesters into some kind of affectionate alliance. Surely then the law of averages would take over and the devil would kick the bucket any day.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Crowley should just stick to the method that's been proven to work time and time again, man! ;)
ext_1310: (hee!)

[identity profile] musesfool.livejournal.com 2010-05-13 06:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! This is adorable.

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you!

[identity profile] layne67.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
Awwwww, whether he likes it or not, Crowley and his pet hound are adowwwable!

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-14 03:58 pm (UTC)(link)
I kind of like the idea of this guy who completely fucks everyone over, but is such a sap around his doggie. XD

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_bluebells/ 2010-05-16 11:37 am (UTC)(link)
YAY! This is exactly the story I wanted to read after the introduction of Crowley and his Big Puppy! I wibble with glee for Hellminster, the notion of Crowley and Lilith facing off at a breeders' competition and Crowley being wise enough to plan the contingency of endearing Lucifer and the Winchesters to each other so Murphy's Law could inevitably smack the devil down, too. Brilliant!

I luff all over your portrait of the King of the Crossroads. Luff luff. <3

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-16 02:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Crowley and Asmodeus vs. Lilith and Mr. Tibbles is a centuries-old war meted out in prize ribbons and trick-offs. Asmodeus is great at fetching souls, but Mr. Tibbles can bark in time to Black Sabbath.

;) Thanks!

[identity profile] huntress69.livejournal.com 2010-05-17 01:59 am (UTC)(link)
I wanted Crowley fics and was pointed here and I am so glad I was. Now I have to make a category in my Mems for him. Thanks for the giggle - and I would have loved to have seen this in canon. Oh, I forgot to mention the bit about Lilith and Mr. Tibbles - that was priceless.
Edited 2010-05-17 02:00 (UTC)

[identity profile] twoskeletons.livejournal.com 2010-05-17 02:26 am (UTC)(link)
Aww, awesome, thank you! I'm glad I could help in your Crowley search, he is so great. XD