and starring Sebastian Roche as Sebastian Roche

[whynot]

MISHALECKI EXCHANGE OMG!

Thanks to everyone who wished me luck on my hiatus, you guys are really lovely <333. Is it really a fandom hiatus if you can't STFU about fandom during your hiatus, I wonder? I picked up a new habit over the break called Sebastian Roche, and relatedly, Odyssey 5. SEBASTIAN ROCHE. Where the hell did they find this guy? Why does he think he's a 14-year-old with a Myspace? Why is my reaction to it evenly split between OMG STOP and OMG OMG OMG MOOOOOAAARRRR? I would like to investigate his hips. Mmmm. Here is the one with Roche and Misha being adorable. IS THERE FIC YET?? YOU GUYS.

WHAT IS ODYSSEY 5? It's further evidence that Sebastian Roche plays only one character: Sebastian Roche Balthazar. You know how Misha always plays a creep? Roche always plays a douche. THE WAY OF THE WORLD. Odyssey 5 is a canceled Canadian scifi ensemble show from 2002 (but set in 2012) where a space crew was sent back in time five years to stop the earth exploding. There's angst about destiny and second chances, but there are also SENTIENT BUILDINGS and THINGSTIELY BEINGS from another world, or possibly the internet. THE INTERNET, because this show is also a hilarious example of how much technology has changed over just ten years. Aww, people from the past, aren't you adorable!




This is Kurt Mendel: famous award-winning biologist, Balthazar's vessel, and dick joke connoisseur. Let us not pretend that I started this show for anything other than Balthaface In Space, but LOL, TV, you are not even trying to dissuade my crossovers. Here is Kurthazar's first scene, putting together a satellite in space with remote control:

KURT: "Closer... closer... Do it, do it, baby."
SARAH: "Why does everything that comes out of your mouth have to do with sex?"
KURT: "Maybe because we're riding in a 3 billion dollar fanny symbol. Don't quote me."
SARAH: "If I started quoting you, they'd shut down the space program."



KURT: "Did you know that oxygen deprivation enhances sexual--"
SARAH: "I don't wanna know."

WHATEVER YOU SAY, BALTHAZAR

And and and, for real, upon being confronted with the end of the world, CAN YOU GUESS WHAT KURTHAZAR'S FIRST REACTION IS? It was not to save it, at least at first.


Blow coke and jump on the bed.


No big deal, just projecting lesbian bondage porn on a screen in his bedroom while he bangs this chick. "Stop using atheism as an excuse for group sex!" someone actually said to him.


OMG SURPRISE IT IS RICK WORTHY THE ALPHA VAMP!!

MY FAVORITE EPISODE IS PROBABLY WHEN CLAIRE MADE A CAMEO THOUGH. It's the episode where Kurthazar, militant atheistic hedonist, gets brainwashed into joining a religious cult led by Claire. You're a tricky one, Claire.


That thing in the background is essentially a giant Samulet.

O CANADAAAAA. You know what the biggest giveaway is that this is a Canadian show? It's not the accents. It's not even that hockey metaphor one of the lead characters made. It is:

--the Our Lady Peace poster in the teenager's room.


WhyyYYyyYYyyYyy is Superman dead??

I LOOOOVED OUR LADY PEACE, OMG. Can we take a quick jaunt through memory lane here?

OMG LOOK I AM FOURTEEN AGAIN I LOVED THIS SONG, oh man, I wanted to bang Raine Maida so hard.



I owe people comment/PM replies and I will get to those ASAP, but things are still hectic on my side so please bear with me. I'm back for the most part! I missed you guys so muhuhuhuuuuch.

[originally posted at http://whynot.dreamwidth.org/46803.html | comments]

Comments

[scarletsherlock.livejournal.com]

Roché was born in Paris, France, on August 4, 1964; he is of Scottish and French ancestry. He is also fluent in four languages: English, French, Spanish and Italian. As a teenager, he lived for six years on a sailing boat with his family traveling from France to the Mediterranean, Africa, South America and the Caribbean.

WHAT WHAT IN THE WHAT NO YOU GUYS STOP MAKING ME SHIP RPF I CAN'T NOOOOOOOOO

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

YOU CAN YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

IMAGINE. IMAGINE MISHA COLLINS AND SEBASTIAN ROCHE GOING SAILING TOGETHER. Perhaps Roche goes swimming off the side of the boat whilst Misha peers at the ocean in search of menacing, dark shapes...

Does that help?

[scarletsherlock.livejournal.com]

THINGSTIEL-Y SHAPES?? :DDD

Man, I'm close. I don't know if I could honestly do RPF for real, but these guys make it so, so easy.

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

"Seb, watch out! It's the Kraken!"

Oh, I can't do RPF for real. I just, I don't know, get my morals to look elsewhere for the thirty seconds it takes to try and lure other people in ;)

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

I CAN GET BEHIND SEBASTIAN/ROCHE CASEFIC. There aren't enough casefics that take place on the water, y'know? Seb knows the water. Misha knows obscure folklore shit. Between debating the best way to catch a flesh-eating mermaid, THEY HAVE SEX.