whynot: etc: oh deer (forest for the trees)
Las ([personal profile] whynot) wrote2009-12-19 09:51 am

Merlin: Land & Bread

[livejournal.com profile] allothi listed a few things I would never write. One was "King Arthur and Queen Gwen conquering the rest of Albion because those other monarchs obviously don't treat their people the way a civilised leader should." Well, I sure showed her!

Land & Bread
521 words. Rated PG. Warnings: a head on a pike?


They execute the king in the center of town for all his people to see. The people have to see with their own eyes and hear with their own ears that the old days have come to an end. He dies calling the name of his god, but of course no god comes to protect him, and when his head rolls to the ground, the crowd gasps and cries out.

The old king is dead and Arthur has stepped into his place. Long live the king.

"You don't think the head on a pike is a bit... much?" asks Gwen, sotto voce.

"You don't have to look at it if it displeases you," says Arthur as Galahad stands the pike in the ground.

"It's not that," she replies, and Arthur takes her hand and they wave at their new subjects. She says, "What if it begins to smell?"

In the evening they visit Lancelot, who has spearheaded the conquest of this country, and he greets them with ale and the soft nutty cheese that is the specialty of this place. He bows before them, even though Arthur and Gwen has continuously told him oh Lancelot you don't need to do that when we are alone, but that is Lancelot for you. He is still filthy from destroying the last of the pagan temples this afternoon, and he says, "I apologize for receiving you in such a state."

"Lancelot," Gwen smiles as they sit down. "It's no problem."

"Merlin and Morgana are still out hunting the last forest god," he informs them, "and they say won't be back until tomorrow at the earliest."

"It's not a god," Arthur points out, "but a demon who has fooled these people into thinking it is a god. It stands for lies and trickery, and there are still some here even now who are under its sway."

"Yes, we must be wary," Gwen agrees.

Lancelot nods. "Of course."

"How soon do you think our subjects can start moving to this country?" she muses. "Have you seen all the arable land near the eastern border? If we encourage the people of Camelot to move here, we can mitigate the city's food and housing shortage."

"Those are the priestesses' lands, are they not?" Arthur asks. "Well, 'priestesses', so-called."

"Gawain and Caradoc are dealing with the priestesses," Lancelot says. "We have already taken some of them prisoner."

"Let me talk to them later," says Gwen. "I'll see if I can find out where the others are hiding."

Arthur's brow crinkles and he covers her hand with his own. "Are you sure?"

She rolls her eyes. "Arthur, I don't plan to be the kind of queen whose sole purpose is to look pretty on the throne."

"You've proven that," he says softly, and lifts her hand to his lips to kiss it. "You've proven that a thousand times over, my love."

"The knights are honored to fight alongside their queen," Lancelot says, smiling.

"Thank you, Lancelot."

"Well, demon-worshippers or not," Arthur says, "these people make a delicious cheese."

And Lancelot and Gwen agree that, yes, the cheese is quite sublime.
facetofcathy: four equal blocks of purple and orange shades with a rusty orange block centred on top (Default)

[personal profile] facetofcathy 2009-12-19 03:36 pm (UTC)(link)
That's a hell of a sharp skewer that got Merlin, SPN and rather a few others all in one go.

They are all so intensely in character, too.

I liked this a lot.

[personal profile] nixwilliams 2009-12-19 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
DDD:

oh lordy! i like it, but i loathe it!
ineptshieldmaid: Language is my playground (Default)

[personal profile] ineptshieldmaid 2009-12-19 11:35 pm (UTC)(link)
CHEEEESE

that is all

[personal profile] allothi 2009-12-20 06:40 pm (UTC)(link)
I still <3 this. Though I have to admit that I did sort of creatively interpret "never write" to include "possibly unlikely to write without a little tactical prodding." :D

Also I still want MOAR!!
briar_pipe: chibi Mordred with his hood (chibi!Mordred)

[personal profile] briar_pipe 2010-01-07 09:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Chibi!Mordred says your story is TRUFAX and that Arthur is a filthy ROMAN who will DESTROY ALBION.

By which I meant this was so pointed it hurt, and the cheese. Dear god, the cheese. This must be why I love you.