and starring Sebastian Roche as Sebastian Roche

[whynot]

MISHALECKI EXCHANGE OMG!

Thanks to everyone who wished me luck on my hiatus, you guys are really lovely <333. Is it really a fandom hiatus if you can't STFU about fandom during your hiatus, I wonder? I picked up a new habit over the break called Sebastian Roche, and relatedly, Odyssey 5. SEBASTIAN ROCHE. Where the hell did they find this guy? Why does he think he's a 14-year-old with a Myspace? Why is my reaction to it evenly split between OMG STOP and OMG OMG OMG MOOOOOAAARRRR? I would like to investigate his hips. Mmmm. Here is the one with Roche and Misha being adorable. IS THERE FIC YET?? YOU GUYS.

WHAT IS ODYSSEY 5? It's further evidence that Sebastian Roche plays only one character: Sebastian Roche Balthazar. You know how Misha always plays a creep? Roche always plays a douche. THE WAY OF THE WORLD. Odyssey 5 is a canceled Canadian scifi ensemble show from 2002 (but set in 2012) where a space crew was sent back in time five years to stop the earth exploding. There's angst about destiny and second chances, but there are also SENTIENT BUILDINGS and THINGSTIELY BEINGS from another world, or possibly the internet. THE INTERNET, because this show is also a hilarious example of how much technology has changed over just ten years. Aww, people from the past, aren't you adorable!




This is Kurt Mendel: famous award-winning biologist, Balthazar's vessel, and dick joke connoisseur. Let us not pretend that I started this show for anything other than Balthaface In Space, but LOL, TV, you are not even trying to dissuade my crossovers. Here is Kurthazar's first scene, putting together a satellite in space with remote control:

KURT: "Closer... closer... Do it, do it, baby."
SARAH: "Why does everything that comes out of your mouth have to do with sex?"
KURT: "Maybe because we're riding in a 3 billion dollar fanny symbol. Don't quote me."
SARAH: "If I started quoting you, they'd shut down the space program."



KURT: "Did you know that oxygen deprivation enhances sexual--"
SARAH: "I don't wanna know."

WHATEVER YOU SAY, BALTHAZAR

And and and, for real, upon being confronted with the end of the world, CAN YOU GUESS WHAT KURTHAZAR'S FIRST REACTION IS? It was not to save it, at least at first.


Blow coke and jump on the bed.


No big deal, just projecting lesbian bondage porn on a screen in his bedroom while he bangs this chick. "Stop using atheism as an excuse for group sex!" someone actually said to him.


OMG SURPRISE IT IS RICK WORTHY THE ALPHA VAMP!!

MY FAVORITE EPISODE IS PROBABLY WHEN CLAIRE MADE A CAMEO THOUGH. It's the episode where Kurthazar, militant atheistic hedonist, gets brainwashed into joining a religious cult led by Claire. You're a tricky one, Claire.


That thing in the background is essentially a giant Samulet.

O CANADAAAAA. You know what the biggest giveaway is that this is a Canadian show? It's not the accents. It's not even that hockey metaphor one of the lead characters made. It is:

--the Our Lady Peace poster in the teenager's room.


WhyyYYyyYYyyYyy is Superman dead??

I LOOOOVED OUR LADY PEACE, OMG. Can we take a quick jaunt through memory lane here?

OMG LOOK I AM FOURTEEN AGAIN I LOVED THIS SONG, oh man, I wanted to bang Raine Maida so hard.



I owe people comment/PM replies and I will get to those ASAP, but things are still hectic on my side so please bear with me. I'm back for the most part! I missed you guys so muhuhuhuuuuch.

[originally posted at http://whynot.dreamwidth.org/46803.html | comments]

Comments

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

Why does he think he's a 14-year-old with a Myspace?

HE'S JUST PROUD OF HIS ABS OKAY. He wants all of twitter to be proud with him!

Also, shut your mouth with that Collins/Roche stuff. I glanced at Sebastian Roche's twitter the other day and immediately decided that he and Misha are my twitter otp. Then I saw those pictures and went oh, no, apparently they're my irl otp. I like to imagine them hitting it off on set and then meeting up when they're both back in LA, and getting up to all sorts of shenanigans. Possibly having coffee together, but possibly also taping fake moustaches to all the street signs, you know?

This comment brought to you by the fact that I keep telling myself I'm not doing conventions anymore, and then Misha and Sebastian Roche both sign up for the one in October, presumably just to spite me.

ALSO HI LASS I MISSED YOU VERY MUCH.

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

HE'S SO SHAMELESS ABOUT IT, IS MY FAVORITE PART. Hey world, check out this stuff I know that I got. Hey world, why don't you bug people about putting me in cons? AND THEN THEY DO. AND NOW HE IS IN CONS. CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SHENANIGANS. CAN YOU EVENNNNNNNN.

I think Roche's the type to like blow wads of cash on everything, and Misha is kind of amused by this, so maybe he meets up with Roche in expensive restaurants, and on the flipside, Roche is amused by the contents of Misha's pantry ("Is there real food in here?") and somehow fucks up the ginger-chopping for their let's-cook-dinner-together non-date.

I MISSED YOU A LOT ZEIT DARLING

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

AND THEN THEY DO. AND NOW HE IS IN CONS. CAN YOU IMAGINE THE SHENANIGANS. CAN YOU EVENNNNNNNN.

I AM TRYING TO RESIST FINDING OUT FOR SURE. Lass you are not helping.

I'm not even going to front and pretend like I didn't just look Sebastian Roche up on Wikipedia. Roché was born in Paris, France, on August 4, 1964; he is of Scottish and French ancestry. He is also fluent in four languages: English, French, Spanish and Italian. As a teenager, he lived for six years on a sailing boat with his family traveling from France to the Mediterranean, Africa, South America and the Caribbean. CAN YOU IMAGINE. Roche and Misha can have whole conversations in French and Russian, respectively, where neither knows what the other is saying. (When Jared asks what they're talking about, Misha lies and says they were talking about him.)

UNGH LASS CAN YOU IMAGINE THE KIND OF STORIES SEBROCHE COULD TELL AT CONS. They should get Misha on stage with him, it'd be like a solid fourty-five minute block of anecdotes, some of which were lies.

I actualfax clapped my hands when I saw your icon on my flist feed. Little did I know you were going to tempt me into RPF!

[scarletsherlock.livejournal.com]

Roché was born in Paris, France, on August 4, 1964; he is of Scottish and French ancestry. He is also fluent in four languages: English, French, Spanish and Italian. As a teenager, he lived for six years on a sailing boat with his family traveling from France to the Mediterranean, Africa, South America and the Caribbean.

WHAT WHAT IN THE WHAT NO YOU GUYS STOP MAKING ME SHIP RPF I CAN'T NOOOOOOOOO

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

YOU CAN YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

IMAGINE. IMAGINE MISHA COLLINS AND SEBASTIAN ROCHE GOING SAILING TOGETHER. Perhaps Roche goes swimming off the side of the boat whilst Misha peers at the ocean in search of menacing, dark shapes...

Does that help?

[scarletsherlock.livejournal.com]

THINGSTIEL-Y SHAPES?? :DDD

Man, I'm close. I don't know if I could honestly do RPF for real, but these guys make it so, so easy.

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

"Seb, watch out! It's the Kraken!"

Oh, I can't do RPF for real. I just, I don't know, get my morals to look elsewhere for the thirty seconds it takes to try and lure other people in ;)

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

I CAN GET BEHIND SEBASTIAN/ROCHE CASEFIC. There aren't enough casefics that take place on the water, y'know? Seb knows the water. Misha knows obscure folklore shit. Between debating the best way to catch a flesh-eating mermaid, THEY HAVE SEX.

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

oh my darling I also looked up his Wikipage HAHAHAHA DOES HE NOT BASICALLY SOUND LIKE MISHA'S ~SOULMATE. OMG. MAYBE SEB AND MISHA CAN GO SAILING TOGETHER. Teaching each other phrases in different languages, not that you can trust each other that they're giving you the correct meaning of it.

IF YOU GO TO A CON WITH THEM PEOPLES PLS TO DOCUMENT THOROUGHLYYYYYYY

Little did I know you were going to tempt me into RPF!
IT'S NOT ME, IT'S ROCHE! ROCHE!!! TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOUR RPF IDEAS THAT YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT INDULGING IN.

[zeitheist.livejournal.com]

MAYBE SEB AND MISHA CAN GO SAILING TOGETHER.
THAT WAS WHAT I WAS THINKING. Seriously, though, ~soulmates. Perhaps Seb and Misha go to a strip-club like Misha, Rob and Julie did when they were in Australia. Perhaps Seb will teach Misha some Italian at the convention in Rome that they're both attending! CAN YOU IMAGINE. SEB SPEAKING ITALIAN. IN ITALY. (I'm sorry, he had me at "fluent in four languages")

I WANT TO GO but I'm still trying to pretend I'm not just going because Misha will be there. Although I suppose now I can go under the pretense of taking notes on Misha and Sebastian's interactions? Like a naturalist, in a way.

OH NO, ROCHE AND HIS ABS DIDN'T TEMPT ME INTO THIS. J'ACCUSE!

[twoskeletons.livejournal.com]

I DON'T BLAME YOU. Being fluent in four languages is an easy port of entry into Rochelandia. GIRL I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO if I were in the same room with any of these people, but esp Misha. YOU KNOW THAT PART WHERE CAS EXPLODED? THAT MIGHT BE ME. I will be the one making noises only dogs can hear.

WE NEED ALL THE SEBASTIAN/MISHA NOTES WE CAN HANDLE THOUGH. IT IS YOUR CIVIC FANNISH DUTY.

SEBASTIAN AND MISHA TROLLING THE WOOOOORRRRLLLLD.