we were rewarded by journeys / away from each other

This secret showed up on the new SPNsecrets post, and my heart goes out to you, anon. Sturgeon's Law always applies: you have to work to find the grittier D/C that doesn't let them fix things with sex or Troo Luv, or swap out characterization for stock tropes. It is out there though, and I want you to find it if you're looking for it because when done right, it cuts straight to the bone. I know these things are highly subjective, but if you also like your D/C fics rife with crossed loyalties and stubborn distances, then maybe you might find something you like in...

...my highly subjective D/C starter kit! This is as much for my reference as it is yours, all my favorites in one place. I tried to keep it explicitly D/C instead of the shippiness-masquerading-as-gen that is my wont. I multiship Cas all over the place these days (Cas/regrettable things OTP), but D/C holds a special place in my heart and here are eight fics that I think are pretty amazing.

( SO FUCKING PROFOUND: a D/C starter kit )

It being Poetry Month, have a poem about them:

MOVEMENT SONG

I have studied the tight curls on the back of your neck
moving away from me
beyond anger or failure
your face in the evening schools of longing
through mornings of wish and ripen
we were always saying goodbye
in the blood in the bone over coffee
before dashing for elevators going
in opposite directions
without goodbyes.

Do not remember me as a bridge nor a roof
as the maker of legends
nor as a trap
door to that world
where black and white clericals
hang on the edge of beauty in five oclock elevators
twitching their shoulders to avoid other flesh
and now
there is someone to speak for them
moving away from me into tomorrows
morning of wish and ripen
your goodbye is a promise of lightning
in the last angels hand
unwelcome and warning
the sands have run out against us
we were rewarded by journeys
away from each other
into desire
into mornings alone
where excuse and endurance mingle
conceiving decision.
Do not remember me
as disaster
nor as the keeper of secrets
I am a fellow rider in the cattle cars
watching
you move slowly out of my bed
saying we cannot waste time
only ourselves.

Audre Lorde